Can yas all stfu SBBBBBBBBBSBSBSBSBSSBBSBSSBSBSBSBSBSBSBSBSBSBBBBBB

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There was once a boy named Aladin. He was very poor until he found a magic lamp. When he rubbed the lamp, a genie poped out of the lamp. He said... "I will grant you one wish, master" Aladin thought about this for a long time, until eventually he said... "I wish for all the chocolate in the world" "Very well, master" And the genie granted his wish and Aladin had all the chocolate in the world Unfortunately, because he ate so much chocolate, Aladin died of heart & liver failure

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eat a hot dog

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A plane crashes near an uncharted island with a low supply of fresh water and hardly any animals, except for a few deadly ones. How do the survivors live until rescuers show up? -There were no survivors from the plane crash

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why did the boy die because he got ran over by a tractor

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What's Black, White, and Red all over? A Cow in a giant blender...

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he would like. The man says,"I'm feeling light today so I'll just have some H2O." The man's friend says,"I'm feeling the same. I'll have some H2O, too." The second man died.

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What did the cat say to the bird? Nothing. It's a cat.

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What would happen if an unstoppable object hit and unmovable object? I don't know, I was just wondering

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That moment when the worst part of the movie, is when your pregnant wife pees on the couch.....

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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eh

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock, knock Who's there? Not Susie

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Have you ever been to Uranus? Well I heard it's nice this time of year.

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Kids, your mother and I thought we should tell you this now... You know our dog sparky? Well he... was actually Osama bin Laden and is now dead!

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Why did Jimmy fall over? Jimmy was hit by a bus.

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What do you call a newborn son? The proudest moment of your life. What do you call a newborn daughter? A disappointment.

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Boy, is it hot this summer! How hot is it?! So hot that many people have died as a result!... Drink plenty of water.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he wants to drink. He orders a beer.

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What's the opposite of a joke? An anti-joke. You're reading one right now.

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List of people I love: Hitler Stalin Mussolini Ted Bundy Charles Manson Hannibal Lecter Vladamir Putin Satan Justin Beiber One Direction Chris Brown Chris Brown's parents Oh, and my mother. I love my mother, too.

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Q. what has 2 tums and a boner. A. a horny guy <3

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Did you hear about the Polish couple taking selfies while on vacation in Portugal? They fell off a cliff and died in front of their children. True story.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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