What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

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What stops a train? A missile

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Who would win in a fight between superman and flash? Chuck Norris

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what is big, black, and has hair on it. a big black guy with hair.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, it won't come anyways.

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

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If life gives you lemons.... Life is an abstract noun not a physical object so it can not give you lemons.

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What's worse than an asian driver? A blindfolded asian driver.

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Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

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Why didn't Jimmy go to school? Because Jimmy is a brick wall.

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Yo momma's so fat she weighs more than the average woman of her age and height

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What smells like death and makes kids cry? Dead animal

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What happens when you mix a platinum blond with a black kid? A young african-american child with un-naturally died hair.

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Why did the black man get pulled over by a cop? He was driving 12 miles over the speed limit.

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What happened when the engineering student studied for a physics final? They failed.

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There was a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette on an island. This island is called England, and this situation tends to happen a lot.

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Roses are red. Violates' are blue. Hitler is my homy.

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what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

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The Chinese government. The way they treat their citizens just isn't funny.

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Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because it wasn't a pilot it was a toaster.

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knock knock whos there? IRS Oh....

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Whats funnier than 24 ? 25

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Want to hear a funny joke? Not really.

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i had sex.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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