What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? The extinction of the human species.

How much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The Holocaust

A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

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hmm, thinking, thinking, SNAPPLE!

Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

Yes or No? You're wrong because it was both.

A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

Q:Why do you never run over black guy on a bicycle A: Because that is not a very nice thing to do

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, but the real question is why there are two flies having sex inside a light bulb.

What do you give a sick bird? Tweetment.

Q: My hands are queefing vaginas A: Milk isn't wearing underwears

Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

What do you call a person with cancer A hospital patient, what did you expect? Oh. Of course you expected Chewbacca.

If little Timmy buys 80 candy bars and eats 67, how many candy bars does he have left? Diabetes. Timmy has diabetes. So he was disowned.

If Waldo and Carmen Sandiego had a child it would be fictional.

Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

Q: What's green, red, and covered in cookie crumbs? A: A dead girl scout.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

How do you make an apple puff? Put the apple in a large pan with some water. Cover and cook gently for 20-25 minutes until soft. Add sugar and nutmeg to taste. Transfer to a bowl and leave to cool. Cover with pastry and bake until well-risen and golden.

What did the farmer say to the other farmer? We are both farmers.

A piece of paper got wet. I stuck it over the fireplace to dry off, but it lit on fire.

Why didnt the guy eat cereal? Cause he didnt have any

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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