An old man walks into a bar. It was, a metal cylinder, not unlike a short carbon rod, and not the drinking establishment he normally frequents, named O'Malley's Pub and Eatery, which was, in fact, next to the the building with the protruding metal bar. He suffered greater injury than a younger man due to his advanced age and deteriorating health. But he did eventually recover by strictly adhering to his doctor's advice of bed rest, improved diet, and increased, yet moderate, aerobic exercise.

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how do you confuse a blonde? ask if she wants a cake...then rape her

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How can you tell I'm the biggest idiot in the room? Look at me.

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The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, 'at least it shall be over quickly.'

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What did the atheist say to the jew. Well first they had a long discussion about religion and the jew was actually made an atheist. Truly the work of God.

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You are so ugly that for Halloween you had to trick or treat by phone.

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A terrorist.

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How do you kill a vampire? You can't because vampires aren't real.

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i googled who gives a fuck my name wasn't in the results

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Why cant Stevie Wonder read? Because he is blind

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Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

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Why was the jewish boy crying? i lied he was happy.

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knock knock who's there? john john who? john opens his mouth only to be gunned down by a terrorist attack

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What's long and black? A long and black object.

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what do you call a dog with no legs. It dosent matter it wont come

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Q: What happened when Cupid shot his arrow into the guys heart? A: He died

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Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

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Q: What did the bus driver say to the black man? A: Nothing, he simply greeted him with a nod, as he would do to any other person who chose to ride the bus.

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knock knock whos there? steve oh hi steve please come in

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side... (other side as in the afterlife, for it committed suicide by crossing the road)

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kara is funny she loves her money so she buys a bunny for her honey

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What do you call a man who only eats fast food? Unhealthy.

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Why did the Jewish cross the road? He didn't he died in Holocaust.

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whats worse than getting bit by a tick. getting bit by a deer tick that as lyme disease.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops