A black, Kenyan man enters a race. He comes in second to last as he didn't practice as much as the other contestants.

Your mamas so fat, that any level of physical exercise is strenuous, but also mentally challenging, as she feels that there is a negative astigmatism attached to sweaty, red-faced overweight individuals trying to burn those pounds. This in turn makes her ashamed of the gastronomically decadent life she once lived, and so she doesn't have the confidence to try and reverse the damage she did during those insecure teenage years, instead comforting herself with the sugary, fatty bane of her life. She therefore lives in a vicious circle, angry at herself and the society that won't accept her. But remaining incredibly, repulsively fat.

Yo momma so stupid she threw a rock at the ground And missed.

A man walks off a bus. How did he get on top of it in the first place?

I've got some good news an some bad news. The good new is that you just won 10 million dollars! The bad news is I'm just kidding.

The first train go fowards at 250 mph, and the second train takes a left, how many pancakes are on my rooftop? - The answer is purple because aliens don't dribk coffee

Don't wake me up. If you wake me up then I will give you a puppy. Just wait until you fall in love with the puppy, because then i will kill it in front of you.

If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, then they probably won't hear the lumberjack's cries for help either.

Whats Jewish and Funny? A Jewish Comedian.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't.

An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

What's the sexiest thing on a farm? It depends on what you find sexy, and your personal perception of a farm.

My peni s

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

knock knock..... ding dong...... knock knock!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! they weren't home

Why did the business man jump into a mud puddle? He didn't. He was brutally stabbed to death then thrown in a pigpen in an attempt to conceal the evidence.

what do you do with a fat little chug...kick em in the guts

Why did Kelsey run out of eggs? Horses don't have much sperm.

Q. What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A. Cancer

Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

George Bush=Bush Dick Cheny=Dick Colin Powell=Colon Condoleezza Rice=Rice One of these doesn't belong here.

se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

What can bankrupt people buy? Free stuff.

little miss muffit sat on her tuffit eating her curds and weigh along came a spider and sat down beside her and said hey whats in the bowl?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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