Q: Why don't chicken breasts have nipples? A: because if you freeze them, they will pop the package.

who's specky and stinks of shit? josh moran

what is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews are people and regularly attend a synagogue and pizza is and italian food that many people find to be enjoyable to eat

What do you call a cat up a tree in a party hat? A cat up a tree with a party hat

Jesse uses a prescription shampoo called " greasey poop" because he feels like his hair doesnt look greasy enough. He cries himself asleep every night because he wants a slim body like the rest of the cool kids, so he eats his pain away, which digs him an even deeper hole. the life of Jesse zigenbein is quite tragic to say the least. Please donate 10$ to the "eat ourselves to sleep" campaign

how do you kill justin bieber? put a bag over his head and suffercate him.

So a penguin walks into a bar. Penguin's have been affected by global warming so much that they decide to drink away as they near their final hours.

what kind of dog can tiptoe

What did one viking say to the other viking? I don't know, it was in Danish

Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

Yo momma so ugly..... what more do you want

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reading another damn "worm in your apple" joke.

Q: Why was the boy sad? A: Because his mother just got raped.

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey, I just met you

what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

Why did the Egyptian woman not manage to work the washing machine? The instructions were in English.

What are you getting for Christmas? Wasted.

There are 2 muffins in an oven One of the muffins says to the other 'Jeez it's hot in here' Then the other muffin replied, 'OH MY GOD IT'S A FRICKEN TALKING MUFFIN!!!!!!!!

what is green and has weels? grass i was kidding about the weels.

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? The Big Bang. -BG_Shank_A

Knock knock. Who's there? IRS. Youre being audited, Sir.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was shot In the face. Why did the cow fall out of the tree it was stapled to the monkey.

Roses are red, violets are blue, can I have a ball? No these can't be removed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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