Yo mama is so fat that she is in a diet and wants to lose weight by eating healthy.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What's black and white and red all over? A modern abstract painting

thumb_up thumb_down +32

A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What is brown and sticky?… A shit…

thumb_up thumb_down +30

guess what happened to ur mom? my mom is ded... oh...

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock "Who's there?" Not Sally!

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Whats worse than having cancer? Nothing....

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I actually take my shoes off when I jump on the trampoline.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

wanna hear a joke? womans rights

thumb_up thumb_down +30

whats worse than forgetting your lunch at home? getting diagnosed with type 1 diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Q: How do you count the population of Mexico? A: Take a census.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What do you call cheese that you don't own? Cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why wouldn't anyone want Helen Kellers dog? It's been buried for a long time...

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Q: How much old could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Wood A:10.6 cubic metes

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the boy get hit by a wrecking ball? Because he picked up an upside down penny.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What does a hooker eat for breakfast, lunch, and dinner? Food.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Q :Why did the girl fall off the swing? A: She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

3 Chinese brothers (chu, bu, and fu) come to America and want to change there names. Chu becomes Chuck, Bu becomes Buck, and Fu becomes Tom because obscenities do not make acceptable names.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car, Robin.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why is my penis so small? No, seriously, can anyone tell me?

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Knock Knock. Who's There? Look through your peephole, you lazy bastard.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What has two legs? Half a cat

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops