I like cheese. You like cheese. Have a nice day.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Guy: I have a penis growing out of my crotch. Girl: Hah, sucks to be you! Guy: Yeah.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Whats black and runs really fast? Usain Bolt

thumb_up thumb_down -29

How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Whats worse than being rapped by a giant scorpion. Being gangbanged by a couple giant scorpions

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did Johnny throw the clock out the window? His parents are never around to supervise him.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

what do you call 20 black people under the ocean? a tragic boating accident

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

"Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave."

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Hey babe, do you like video games, movies, mystery books, philosophy, walking in the park, going to the gym, riding bicycles, traveling around the world, and meeting new people? Because I like video games, movies, mystery books, philosophy, walking in the park, going to the gym, riding bicycles, traveling around the world, and meeting new people.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's worse than having a gay friend? 9/11.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A lion, a tiger, and a bear walk down the side of the road. This is what I observed last week in a suburb of Columbus, Ohio.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

yo Mama so stupid a robber stole her t.v and she ran after him yelling, YOU FORGOT THE REMOTE!

thumb_up thumb_down -29

i man walks into a bar, he is found dead two days later with severe head trauma.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

twenty three roaches walk into a bar. the bar is evacuated due to insects.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Friends are a lot like trees I just thought you should know.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

How do you get an elephant into a freezer? You stuff him in there!!

thumb_up thumb_down -31

what do you call a half dead black person crawling across your lawn..............................stop laughing and reload

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Knock knock Whos there your son your son who holy shit dad just let me in

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops