Subject A: Knock Knock! Subject B: *silence* Subsequently, Subject A dejectedly walks home and hangs himself.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

A man walks into a bar He wakes up from his coma 21 years later and learns that humans now serve pumpkins as gods.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Gary.

When Chuck Norris plays Modern Warfare 2, he gets more care packages than Haiti did.

A black man, a white man and a Jewish man all live in the same apartment block. Which is most likely to be at work? None of them, it's Sunday. [L]

Why didn't Little Timmy's parrot talk? It's neck had snapped.

What do bluejays and cardinals have in common? They both Were born during the Medevil period.

roses are red, violets are blue... thats what they tell me because im blind

you know why Michael J Fox makes the best milkshakes? no... but his milkshakes brings all the boys to the yard

How many new born babies does it take to cover the wall? Depends on how hard you throw'em

Whats worse than 10 babies nailed to one tree 1 baby nailed to 10

A bloke runs into the bank, says to the girl "Stick 'em up!" She says "Righty-o, matey" and sellotapes his bollocks to the ceiling.

Mary- Hey Dallas, do you have a suitcase? Dallas- Yeah, why? Mary- I need a suitcase

*The doctor walks in* Knock knock. Whos there? Doctor. Doctor Who?

Why was the man picking his nose? Because he was born without one, and found one he liked.

So, why won't the blonde date the Asian guy? Because she's afraid of commitment.

what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

there once was a man, he was old, and he had one wish...do you wanna know that wish? Well i don't know it because he died two seconds ago from a heart attack. Oh Well...

A: How can you tell a tree is an aspen? B: 'Cause of the way it is.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

One day a baby hit himself on the head with a stuffed animal. I lied, it was a brick, so he died.

No smoking No eating No drinking On this bus Didn't say anything about sniffing

Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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