What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

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Whats black and blue and doesnt bruise? a bruise.

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A possesed goat: "moo"

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What did the woman say to her rapist? I've had better.

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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"Hey want to hear the best knock-knock joke ever." "Sure." "Ok you start." "Knock-knock." "Whos there?" "..........."

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How are jello and frankenstein alike? Both green, both alive, and bill cosby didn't make me want either.

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What's blue and smells like red paint? That blue guy from Megamind.

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yo mamma so fat that when she goes out in high heels she comes back in flip flops

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My dog got out of it's cage. So I found it and be the shit out of

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What did the kid with no brain get for his birthday? Nothing because nobody thought that he would do anything with the toys because he couldn't think of what to do with them.

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knock knok whos there? Jacob Jacob who? U know, your friend!

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What do a carrot and a kangaroo have in common? Nothing...

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Whats worse than pulling down a girls pants and seeing a giant furry bush... finding out her vagina has teeth in it.

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Two pies where sitting in a oven when one of the pies says: God damn it's hot in here. The other pie screams out loud: HOLY SHIT A TALKING PIE!

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What do you call a magic MAAAAAAAAAAAN? A magic man

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You know what's funny? You got AIDs

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What do friends and trees have in common? They will both fall over after being hit multiple times with an ax.

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I read my Uncle an anti-joke. He is still wondering why it made no sense to him.

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Why didnt santa leave presents under the tree? Because santa doesnt exist.

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A wise man once said, "I am wise".

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A man jumped off a 30 story building. What did he learn? Nothing. He died instatly when he hit the ground.

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken a month off from working in their law firm. The mexican man, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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what did the african say after he got beat by the cops? wow i really shouldn't have sliced that mans head off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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