Somebody has robbed your house, how do you gather evidence? Look for traces of watermelon or chicken bones.

Q:what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile? A:get in the batmobile

What did the kid with turrets CHEESE! say to his mom.

Oh s***

Massie is a fatass

why did the man turn on and off the lights 20 times because he was diagnosed with O.C.D as a child

Doctor doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

What happened when the boy fell off of the bridge? He died

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

So three men walk into a bar and buy a round of drinks for everyone. As they do this, three kenyans die of dehydration while their families weep at their feet.

Why does manure smell like poop? Because it is poop.

Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Monkey. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

What did the paralyzed kid get for his 18th birthday? A boner.

What is worst then 9/11? What? Tiger woods

Why did Sarah fall off the swings? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Sarah

What's worse than the WNBA? The Cleveland Cavaliers.

So coool! How did you do that dinosaur!?

Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

A woman woke up next to her husband that was already awake. She said "F*** you" and walked out of the house. On the other side of the world, a horse is giving birth to a chihuahua.

What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

Your mother is so ugly, her genes were passed down through two generations, and now your children are of a similar caliber of ugliness. I'm so sorry.

What is brown and sticky? A Stick

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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