What's small, white, and it killed Bruce Lee? Aspirin.

Q: Why did Sally fall off the swing? A: How the heck would I know? I don't Sally.

Do you know what a rhino really is? It is a really fat and oversized unicorn

There were two penguin's sitting in a bathtub. The first penguin says to the second penguin, "Hey, pass the soap." And the second penguin says, "What do i look like, an alarm clock?"

Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Being caught by the store manager, arrested, convicted, and thrown into jail for petty theft and then getting ass-raped for the next 3 months all because you wanted to check an apple without paying for it.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was shot In the face. Why did the cow fall out of the tree it was stapled to the monkey.

Q: a black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? A: The mexican. They're going to the bookstore to get some books.

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

What do you call a bear in the rain? A wet bear.

What do you get when you mix a black person with an octopus? i dont know. but it sure picks cotton well.

Who's a tool and a NARC? Josh Brami!

Why couldn't the mentally retarded kid hear? It was too dark.

What scares little children and befriends their parents? A clown

What do you call potato salad in Iceland? Edible. The fact that it happens to be in Iceland doesn't make a difference

Why is moral man a great Cerebrity? you would not get it, its too cerebral... Moral: I SAID LEAVE HIM ALONE PLEAAAAAAAAAASE! BUAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!

What happened to the vegetarian when he tried outdoor survival He died due to lack of energy because of his refusal to eat meat and or any living substance

How meny Jews can you fit in an ash-tray? None. There to big

why couldnt the jew play basketball? He was handicapp

Roses are red, violets are blue, can I have a ball? No these can't be removed

Q: how do you fit 100 jews in a car A: 3 in the back one in the passenger seat and 96 in the ash tray

How does a chubby baby eat his chili In a very chubby way with his hands smearing it all over is face

Friends, they're like food. If you eat them, they die.

A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: A ladie not working in the kitchen A: WTF dude thats just terrible

What's the difference between Newt Gingrich's cat and a hand grenade? Gingrich's cat is a domesticated quadriped mammal, a hand grenade is a small bomb that can be thrown by hand

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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