A man walks into an exam room for a doctor's appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Why did the Asian eat so much rice? Because he was hungry.

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Why couldn't little Susie ride her bicycle? She had Cerebral Palsy.

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Q:Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, an honest lawyer and an old drunk are walking down the street together when they simultaneously spot a hundred dollar bill. Who gets it? A:The old drunk, of course; the other three are mythological creatures.

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Man #1:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: I don't know Man #1: Because he died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Because he died? Man #1: Yep. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Really? Come on, I've already answered your stupid question. Man #1: JUST ANSWER! Man #2: Fine, because he died. Man #1: No, peer pressure. Duh. Man #2 promplty punches Man #1 in the face and continues about his buisness.

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What do you get when you cross rice flour,vegetable oil,corn oil,cottonseed oil,soybean oil,dried potatoes,corn flour,maltodextrin,wheat starch,modified rice starch,sugar and mono-and-di-glycerides,malted barley flour,wheat bran,dried black beans and salt? Pringles,Multi Grain,truly original

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What do an elephant, and a banana have in common? Neither one is an ambulance.

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What do Lebron James and Bill Murray have in common? They are both black basketball players. Except for bill murray

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What happened to the guy who dropped his soap in the prison shower? His friend picked it up for him.

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Knock Knock? Who's There? The Gestapo.

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why couldnt hellen keller drive? she was a woman.

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Why was the Irishman ejected from the bar? For breaching client-attorney privilege, and the correct term is disbarred.

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Your dad got tired while running, so he stopped running.

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Is your refrigerator running? If so, you are on drugs, and should see help.

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What's red & is bad for your face? A brick.

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How do you get a black man out of your seat? You ask him very nicely with a great attitude.

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A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer walk into a bar. They order some drinks, sit quietly and stare at their shoes until they've finished their drinks, then go back home and wallow in loneliness, wishing their social skills weren't so abysmal.

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I like my coffee how I like my women Without a penis

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What is a holocaust survivors favorite food nothing

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a dog.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven three twelve. Am i doing it right?

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How many electricians does it take to fix a light bulb? One

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What does china and an 80 year old body builder have in common? They're both asian. I forgot to mention that the body builder is japanese.

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Anti - Jokes. com

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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