Keira Knightley walked in to a coffee shop. The man behind the counter said "Wow, you're Keira Knightley!". Keira replied, "No, actually I am just one of your many masturbatory fantasies. You are currently staring at an old lady that just asked you for a latte". "Oh, by the way. You are drooling and have an erection."

DAVID.B YOU O ES 2 BAR YA TRAMP

What's the difference between Obama and a monkey? They are two different species, so thus they are very different.

Jimmy is taking a walk to Dairy Queen he walks into an allyway where he is shot with a 44 magnum and later dies in hospital his family morns

Why did the car get sucked up by the tornado? Because it was in Pilger, Nebraska.

Why do women like NASCAR? They don't.

Why is the wimpy guy so strong and angry now? Because he took steroids.

What's harder than killing a baby? My penis while doing it. by: Lucky7 LG

U know whats worser than having a worm in your apple... Having 1352 dislikes on your anti-joke...

Why did the man scream? He got shot in the eye with a nail gun.

What do u call a man pointing a gun at you? A man with an anger issue

Why did the boy fall off his bike? He had no legs

-Why did the chicken cross the road? '' I dont know '' -Because it would cross the road and over to you. -Knock knock? '' Who's there?'' - CHICKEN!!!!!!!

Roses Are Potato, Violets Are Booze, Im Irish and i hate Jews.

Your momma smells so bad that she purchased arm and hammer products to improve upon her natural scent.

Every time a bell rings an angel gets it's wings. What they don't tell you is every time a mouse trap snaps an angel gets set on fire.

Knock,Knock Who's there? Afro Circus Ya get the fuk off my property!

Bill had two options the red truck or the blue sedan. Your mother is a whore.

what is the most efficient way to scratch your balls? hire a leprechaun slave.

What did the Asian get on his math assignment? 56%, he forgot about it and passed it in a day late with a number of questions uncompleted.

What's the difference between a Pile of Dead Babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamboghini in my garage

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

Knock knock. Who's there? Mike. Oh, come in.

What is red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...