Why did the girl cry? She got hit by a bus.

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what did the banana say to the orange? nothing because a banana is a fruit

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You're on a bus and the driver is black, you're white friend turns to you and says, We're gonna have a race on the highway!

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Two dogs went out for a walk. Then their master took them home.

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A blonde heard that 90% of all crimes occur within a one-mile radius of the home, so she had a security alarm installed.

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Hah, I bet a faggot that lost his balls in the war is "above" such things as seduction and all things straight! 25 million US dollars, send them to me within a week, or I will hunt you down by tracking down every single one of your fucking followers (all six of them), and make you wish you where dead. And tell me where you live, send me your sister so I can rape her, send me your boyfriend so I can cut him to pieces, send my your children so I can make sure your genes stop, send my your mothers tits so I can hang them on my wall, and kill your father and post the shit on youtube! Maybe then we are halfway close a settlement.

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What's clear and looks like water? Water.

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Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

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WHATS BROWN AND SMELLS LIKE CRAP!?!?!?!?!?!?!? crap

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let me tell u a dirty joke a guy fell in the mud.

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Why did the dog have no legs? Because its previous owner had cut them off.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Pokerface.

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How do you stop a baby crying? You don't. Just walk away.

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God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

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a white man a black man and an asian man had a few drinks at a bar. they all died from alcohol poisoning

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Bill: Wanna know the difference between knowledge and wisdom? Joe: Sure Bill: Knowledge is knowing that an apple is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad.

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Nero? You are alive? Holy shit! You are like so my hero! I love you man! I was so saddened to hear you where tortured and killed, but then I read about this "Axel Knight" and hoped it was you, it sure sounded like you! Please tell me its no joke, you are a hero around these parts, and we really miss you, honestly sir, is it true point zero has become some sort of utopia or are the painkillers making you a bit Hazy? I am Erica by the way, still with the order, but what is this about your empire?

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NASA sent a probe to Uranus and wondered why people were laughing.

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Suicide isn't the answer, it's just the solution. -by Ross

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An englishman, an irishman amd a scotsman were walking down the street. What a fine example of unionism

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John lazzaro likes dick

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Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

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Whats worse than being raped? Being raped twice.

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? ...An innocent, family orientated murder victim.  X

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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