What's worse then the bomb that went off in boston? The second one right after.

What's worse the a bee sting? Two bees stings What's worse the two bee stings? The Holocaust What's worse the. The Holocaust? Three bee stings

Q: What do you get when you cross a cactus and a platypus? A: I was wondering the same thing.

Q: What happened to the fat man on the roller coaster A: The roller coaster went slightly faster due to the laws of gravity

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

Why did the fat guy pick up a noodle from the floor with his buttcheeks? He felt like pasta.

It's raining, its pouring, the old man is snoring. He bumps his head, and is quickly rushed to the ER for serious head trauma

Why was the guy stupid? 'Cause he was!

PROS = good things CONS = bad thing So, if PROgress is a good thing...then why is the US government call CONgress?

chuck norris will never have a heart attack because he has great cardiovascular health.

Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

Why did Abraham Lincoln fall asleep at the movie? He was shot several times in the back of the head.

A man walks into a pole and says "I know, this pun is lame"

What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

A Muslim walks into a bar, and has a pint of lager because he has chosen to integrate into his host country's culture. He then leaves without incident.

How many kleptomaniacs does t take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

If I had a dollar for every time I heard a 'women's rights' joke I'd be bill gates.

A horse walks into a bar and Shits John Taffer is Pissed

Why did Sara fall off the swing? Sara had no arms! Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sara!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

breasts

What's the worst subject in school? None of them. You need school to get by in life. Get over it.

Two peanuts were walking down the street..........pepper.

Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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