What did the sphinx say to the Minotaur? Nothing, as they are fictional creatures and in according to probable science, don't not exist.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your neighbor. Ok, Come in.

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Girl: What's up? Guy: If I told you, would you sit on it?

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Your mom is so fat that she sat on a rock.

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Why did Jimmy's mom cry? She got stabbed in the arm and was suffering while bleeding to death.

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What do you call a sausage with no sauce? A giraffe.

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What would Osama Bin Laden be doing if he were alive today? Drowning

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What's the correct way to eat spaghetti? Put it in your mouth.

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How often do you remember a dream? Well what if I told you that this is a dream go ahead pinch your arm. You probably didn't feel pain. And just incase jump out a fifth story window. Come on do it. Now if you are still reading this you are either dreaming or didn't jump out the window. Shame on you!!!!!!

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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"I vant to blood your suck!" warned Darcula.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

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Q: What happens after you have sex with Michelle Obama? A: You wake up and kill yourself.

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Roses are red I got a new phone But no one to text Forever alone

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Man- Where can I find a book on the holocaust Book keeper- Have you tried comedy? Man- no I havent Book keeper- good it won't be there

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What did the apple say to the pear? ...Nothing they can't talk...

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Yo momma so stupid, she's stupider than this joke.

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When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

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Q:What does a wheel a triangle and a circle all have in common A:There all round, I lied about the triangle.

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Why is the interesting goat so talented at chess? He's Bobby Fischer's dad.

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why did sally fall off the swings she had no arms knock knock whos there not sally

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What's worse than finding half a suicide tablet in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapeled to the chicken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops