Sammy bought 48 donuts. He ate 36. What was Sammy left with? Diabetes. Sammy was left with diabetes.

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Why was it really gross when the blonde dove into the swimming pool? Because the swimming pool was full of phlegm!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Doctor Harold Boo, I was your grandmother's primary caregiver, I'm here to inform you that she died of a massive heart attack.

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If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

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A man walks into a bar After months of rehab he is giving in to his drinking abuse again and will ruin his life as well as his family

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What did the cookie ask the glass of milk? Will you wash me down

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Why did the prostitute begin to cry when she saw the chinese patron's penis? His testicles are diced onions.

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Two men walk into a bar. An hour later another man sees them knocked out on the ground. Q: What Happened A: They walked into a BAR.

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? Using teamwork and coordination, each can place one foot on the seat of the stool, and using each other for balance and support, they can all stand on the stool. The fact that they are gay is irrelevant.

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

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How do you stop a baby from spinning round a washing line. Hit it in face with a baseball bat.

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Barny the purple dinosaur has no imagination, stuck his finger up his ass and called it masterbaition!

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Q. What do you call a bashed black man laying on pavement? A. Neapolitan

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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

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Atheism

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Why did the black guy drink the kool aid? Because there was a glass of kool aid next to him and he was thirsty.

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knock, , knock , who's there the gas man the gas man who ? the gas man who is gonna turn your gas off !

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A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

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How can you tell the difference between Brooke Colbert or any other girl Jesse has been with? It's easy, Brooke the only one Jesses ever been with. They even share the same bra size.

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So a guy comes into a bar... And he is cited for public indecency.

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Don't worry about giving me your phone number, I'll just follow you home later.

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What's black and white and read all over? Michael Jackson bleeding, I spelled " red" wrong

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Knock, knock who's there? Steve Evans. Steve Evans who? You've already forgotten me? We just met on Eharmony yesterday.

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knock knock whos there? dave dave who ? dave starts to cry because his grandmothers oldtimers has restricted her from remembering her grandson dave.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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