What shoes keep dogs quiet? Hush puppies.

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what's worse than waiting 45 minutes in an amusement park ride? getting your penis chopped off.

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So there's a black man riding a bike down the street. A police officer pulls him over to tell him that his back tire seems to be flat. The black man says thank you, and continued riding his bike. Later, he would repair his tire.

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Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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Sometimes I wonder; why is that frisbee getting closer? Then it hits me. Someone just threw a frisbee at me.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin that someone shot with red paintballs.

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I named my son ps2 controller

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What do you get when you rape a dead baby filled with jalapeños? A lifetime in prison, and a burning penis.

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how does cody get laid? he doesnt.

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Don't quote me on this Nero, but she kinda deserves it, she should know better, its not like you have gotten this far by not knowing your limits, even if you tend to break them way too often. Can you get rid of the hallucinations with your mind alone? If not get to sleep asap! And stay asleep for a month or so, and if they somehow cant feed your system intravenously, they can all get the fuck out of there.

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Gay marriage is freaking gay.

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Why did Rebecca Black die? She killed herself due to the cruelty of many people

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a murderer sees a young child left alone at a park... he promptly finds the childs mother and returns her to her home.

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How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: *locks door* NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! *opens door* NEXT!

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Why did the bunny hit the drum? It didn't because it did not have the mental capacity or physical capabilities to do so

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Roses are red, My name is Dave, This poem makes no sense, Microwave.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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A group of young men walks into a bar. They drink some booze, laugh, have a great time and then go home to sleep.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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How many ADD kids does it take to screw...

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This sentance contains three errers

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, what can I get you?" He is then checked into the psychiatric ward at the local hospital, for talking to a duck.

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What is the difference between Acenaphthoquinone and Acetoguanamine? I don't know...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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