What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

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Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

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A Duck walks into a bar.

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What do you call a fish with no I Defected at birth

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There once was a man from Nantucket, He sailed a boat.

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What's big, white, and kills you if it falls out of a tree. A Fridge

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Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

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Do you know why the Mexican didn't like hot dogs? I don't know either.

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Why can't Stuart post a joke? Because he is using a giant iphone

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead live in the same neighborhood. They are Desperate Housewives

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What did the black guy say after coming home from school? "I just got home from school."

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Q : What did the construction worker get for christmas? A: Nothing a building fell on him 3 days earlier

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What is 33 + 1? Penis

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Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

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Yo mama so stupid, she signed an apointment with Dr. Pepper

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Your mother's so fat she occupies more space than a thin person does and is more likely to bump into environmental objects.

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Na na na na na Neo! Na na na na na na 'Sporin!

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So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

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This sentance contains three errers

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin that someone shot with red paintballs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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What did Helen Keller name her pet dog? dfhiwueghweigw

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What do you get when you rape a dead baby filled with jalapeños? A lifetime in prison, and a burning penis.

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Don't quote me on this Nero, but she kinda deserves it, she should know better, its not like you have gotten this far by not knowing your limits, even if you tend to break them way too often. Can you get rid of the hallucinations with your mind alone? If not get to sleep asap! And stay asleep for a month or so, and if they somehow cant feed your system intravenously, they can all get the fuck out of there.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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