what did the food critic say when he was handed a snickers? I'm allergic to peanut butter

What's black an blue and doesn't like sex? The 8year old in my trunk.

What happened when the Mexican put the Popsicles in the fridge? They melted

Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I have a pint or two.

What did Batman say to Robin before going into the Batmobile? Get in the car.

What's worse than losing the remote? Dying of cancer.

Q: what sport has a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench? A:the NBA

justin beiber sucks

This is a joke.

Q. Whats Red and yellow and has braces? A.Pierre-Louis

Q: Why did Jesus die for our sins? A: He didn't.

Roses are Red, Violets are not blue they are violet, nothing rhymes with this, I give up

An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

Why are a black man's eyes always bloodshot red after having sex? Pepper spray.

Why are Asians such bad drivers? They're not: it is a racist stereotype that is propagated by people who are so insecure that they must put others down to feel good about themselves.

So a guy walks into a bar and says, "I can hold a spoon in between my butt-cheeks." Jillian Michaels asked him if that will help him lose weight.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are unintelligent creatures of instinct, and can tell no significant differences between the pavement and the road. It was unfortunate that a bus was speeding past at the moment this event happened.

I'm pretty sure you can't throw a fridge...

Jehovas Witnesses: Summer vacation edition reality show: BItch: Do you know Jesus? Guy: Goddammit you A*Beep*SSHOLES again! I keep telling you all this is m0thertrucking Spain, I know like 500 Jesus`s living in this town alone! *slams door* Moral: Everybody knows at least something about the goddamn Jesus! Ill try asking "Is he the guy that lives downstairs?" Next time and see what happens.

A man finds a woman stumbling around on the street... So he asks sarcastically "what drugs are you on?" The lady starts crying and says "I was raped"

Try this on your friend Have him start with "knock knock" Then blankly stare at him, if he asks you To reply tell him no one is home

Two men walk into a bar...They are traveling together for a convention and like pub type bars and are excited to be there.

I don't get it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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