Someone just commented on my joke! ... oh wait it was myself

What is the difference between a park bench and a Mexican? The park bench can actually suport a family A. Woj

My dad died on Mothers Day, my mother was happy. Actually Iied, we were all sad.

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? He said : "where's my tractor?!"

How many Obamas does it take to screw an economy? What do you think?

What do you call a lesbian eskimo? The name she was given at birth.

Your face is hilarious.

5 black men walk into a 7-11 at midnight. They clog the all of the toilets in the mens bathroom causing them to over run.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be. He could not be. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. He's either in great danger or has a psychological disorder.

There was once a really smart Hufflepuff.

What did the average man say the the bird? HOODINI

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not very intelligent and was scared by a shadow. The chicken's survival instincts caused it to cross the road, away from the shadow. The chicken crossed the road safely, and is now happily pecking at worms.

A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

A man walks into a bar and sees that the pianist is just twelve inches tall. He asks the bartender, ''How come you have a 12-inch pianist?'' The bartender replies, ''We have a genie in the back room. He'll answer all your wishes, but be careful, because he has a little trouble hearing.'' The man walks into the back room and asks the genie for a million bucks. The genie then gives him a million ducks. The man comes out and tells the bartender that the genie misheard his wish. The bartender says, ''Come on, now! Do you really think I asked for a 12-inch pianist?!''

Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

Whats worse tan finding a worm in your apple? Being touched by Michael Jackson

A Muslim man gets onto a transatlantic airliner. All the other passengers are privately nervous, but no one mentions it.

what has wheels and drives? a boat i lied about the wheels

Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

What happens when you die? Your body gets decomposed by bacteria

my grandpa told me "dont let fear rule your life" 2 hours later he got hit by a train.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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