A seal walks into a club.

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Roses are red Violets are blue If you need a poo.... ...hold it in.

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Did I say twenty times? I meant two hundred, you already know this I gather, but your subconcious understands mathmatics and multiplications at a whole different level because its potential is indefinite.

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why did the girl die. because she was bullied and abused everyday by her family and friends. she was homeless and was forced to drop a bomb on her own forest. there fore she stabbed herself.

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Why did the man crossed the busy road? Because he was sick of life.

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Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Knock Knock. (No answer) Knocker: " I guess the resident of this home isn't home at this hour."

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You in love with me? Like platonic? Fine, we will move operations elsewhere, you really got to tell me who you are working for someday.

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Why did the gay guy go in the bar? To find some hookers

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Hey, I'm Schrödinger, and this is crazy! But here's a sealed box... the cat lives, maybe...

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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what has wheels and runs on gas? a car with feet

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How did the Mexican cross the border without getting caught? He didn't; he was executed immediately.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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How do you make a penguin fly? You strap it to the roof of a plane.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, your son just died of terroristic bombing.

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Don't believe in Atheists.

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Why did God create Ebola? Because he hates us all.

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what time does the japanese guy go to the dentist? well his appointment was for 11:30, so he might show up approximately 5 minutes prior to the appointment time, just to make sure everything goes steadily as planned

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What is worse-losing your phone or failing school? Apartheid

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Q: How do you know what will happen when the world willl end? A: by experience

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Donald Duck walks into a drug store and asks the lady behind the counter for a bag of condoms. So the lady says, "Sure thing sir, would you like me to put that on your bill"? Donald says," THIT(Shit)NO, I'LL THUFFOCATE! (Suffocate)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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