A black man a white man and an asian man walk into a bar have a few drinks and on thier drive home run over a three year old little girl and here to month old sister and they go to prison for the rest of thier lives (they shouldn't of let the asian drive)

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you stop a bus? You press the brake pedal, causing the brake pads to squeeze the tires. Which will slow the momentum of the bus to the point of stopping.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the kid hide under the table? There was an earthquake.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why did susy fall off the swing? Cause she has no arms knock knock Who's there? not susy

thumb_up thumb_down +1

hi im bob i ate a Pickle sucked a boob and died of a haert atak

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Frontbut-

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because this chicken had a mental disability and saw on the news that there was a hospital on the other side of the road that could treat his illness and possibly save his life, allowing him to fulfill his life-long dream of retirement. But knowing that chickens do not possess the brain power capable of understanding the situation that this chicken was in, it had probably gotten lost and just wandered off.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What happens when you give a fat man scissors? He cuts off the foreskin of your penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I am hot he is not can you beleive it I got shot

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the dinosaurs die out? This is a long and debated subject, and as no one was alive back then and no solid evidence has been found to support any theories we can only wait.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the jews get off the bus? Because i threw a fridge at it

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats worse than getting hit whit a baseball? getting hit by a train

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A duck walks into a convenience store and asks for a tube of chapstick.He says "Put it on my tab".

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Whats the difference between Jesus and the Pope. Jesus died 2 thousand years ago

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why didn't the boy eat his soup? It was to hot.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: what do you call a mushy green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

thumb_up thumb_down +1

if john has 400 cookies and eats 300 what does he have left? diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why does Santa live in the north pole? Because his spicy body fat keeps him warm.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

If an oak tree falls in the woods, and the tree has 3 squirrel nest in them, then does a whale jizz in the ocean?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what's the difference between me and callum ? a couple of miles.... and id like to keep it that way

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q. Why was the little boy sad? A. He had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the man die when he hugged the pillow? He was hallucinating at the grand canyon.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How did the black guy swim across the Atlantic? He didn't. He was prepared to, but then went on Expedia and found a ticket with Continental Airlines that was in his budget. He did not like the amount of service he recieved, and decided in the future he will save up and fly with a different company, or in fact swim across.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops