What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

Why are many frogs green? Because yes they are.

Why is Lindsay Lohan out of prison? No, I'm asking.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

What do you call the offspring of an elephant? A baby elephant.

what is red, white, and spins around real fast? a baby in a washing machine

whats big and green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a snooker table

A man walks into a bar... He has a severe drinking problem, and his wife weeps for him

A Jew man gets on a train. He sits down and a hour and a half later he is dropped of at his proper destination.

What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot you racist S.O.B.

Roses are red Violets are blue Trash gets dumped Just like you

What starts with P and ends with ORN? Porn

The teacher asked: If you have two apples, and I give you two, how many do you have now? FOUR said the student.

Two lions are walking down the street. One lion says to the other, "where is everybody?"

When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you are just a figment of my imagination.

I have a great knock knock joke. You start. Go.

Your momma is so fat, her doctor recommended exercising more and eating healthier.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Whats worse than standing on lego? Rebecca black. whats worse than Rebecca Black? Justin Bieber. Whats worse than justin Bieber? Standing on a baby that isnt yours.

Q: What race was Jesus Christ? A: None, he's not real

How do you kill Glenn Campbell? Stab him with a screwdriver.

What do you call Bob if he gets a nose ring? Bob

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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