hey I just met you, and this is crazy. I have alzheimers. Hey i just met you.

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That would mean that you are not its leader, or that you are, the result would have been the same, if you are the "head honcho" they would have gone for you, and your employees. Now, if you are an employee, they would have gone for your leader, and of course you. So between us and nobody else really its fucking antijoke, are you the leader?

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What does the Bill in Bill Clinton stand for? Bilious.

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If pro- is good or favored and con- is bad, then why do people favor the constitution and stay away from prostitution?

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Barack Obama.

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What is less funny than a clown? Another clown ... but with fewer limbs.

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What was the black guy doing in Mississippi? Just hanging around.

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One Direction has 12 letters. So does gayyyyyyyyyy. Coincidence? I think not.

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What did the man with one eye say to the woman with one leg at 2 p.m? Good afternoon.

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Whats red and crawls up your leg? A homesick abortion.

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your mother is so fat that she probably watches her calorie intake every day

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Q) What did the farmer say who'd lost his tractor? A) Where's my tractor?

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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PENIS :)

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Knock Knock Who's there? Rapist :(

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What does a Cuban do when he gets a flat tire? He pulls over and replaces it.

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What is it... Michael J Fox has a small one, modonna doesnt have one, Arnold Shwatznegger has a long one, the pope doesn't use his, and bill clinton uses his a lot. A last name

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Linda: See that rainbow? Isn't it beautiful? Bart: I'm color blind.... Linda: Well...this is awkward...

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yo mama's so fat, yo mama's so ugly; your mothers breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks

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Wanna know what I don't get? I was gonna say yo face, but that would be mean.

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rozes r read violots r bue i cannt soell causse ima bliend

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What's worse than dropping you're ice cream? Getting your face mauled off by a German Shepard.

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knock knock who's there? Police oh shit

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Urban ghettos

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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