Yo momma so fat, when she walks she wakes the dead -Ryan Vallee

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't a Ferrari in my garage

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ewrg

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? The pilot. You racist.

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Why did the girl scream? She was being raped.

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What do you call a guy with no arms and legs buried 6 feet under the ground? Doug What do you call a guy with no arms and legs buried 3 feet under the ground? Douglas

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How many pastry chefs does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. It's a fairly simple job.

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

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Q: Where did Sarah go when the bomb exploded? A: Everywhere.

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5 little monkeys jumping on the bed 1 fell off and broke it's skull. Momma told the doctor and the doctor said,"Your a bad mom."

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Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

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a man paints himself yello shrinks himself and walks into a baber shop then he relizes that the sizers are yello so he gets cut up into shreds and dies. THE END!

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Where did the RICH black man go to? His home

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Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

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what did the super popular, beautiful girl say to her stalker? i dont know, i wasnt the stalker.

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How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

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what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

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Why was the black family eating KFC? Because KFC tastes very nice and there was a discount on the family bucket.

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Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

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What did god say to Jesus. "Dude, she's not a virgin"

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Why isn't Billy Mays on TV anymore? Beacause Billy Mays was in a tradgic accident where a bowling ball fell on his head, and a couple days later he died of head trama. His family can't bear to hear his voice anymore.

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Man: Am i going to be alright? Doctor: No, you're going to die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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