Sammy bought 48 donuts. He ate 36. What was Sammy left with? Diabetes. Sammy was left with diabetes.

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What did Sir Mix a lot say to the girl with a big butt? Your very beautiful.

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Two men walk into a bar. An hour later another man sees them knocked out on the ground. Q: What Happened A: They walked into a BAR.

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Homo say what?

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead...

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A man walks into a bar After months of rehab he is giving in to his drinking abuse again and will ruin his life as well as his family

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what is the best way to stand out from the croud? open up your butt hole and take a video for to put on dat jumbotron

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What's the difference between a volleyball and a tree? They're both volleyballs except for the tree.

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A man and a women are having sex. He farted so she left before he came.

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Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? it has no legs.

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The teacher asks Timmy "why is your cat at school today?" Timmy says, crying, "Because I heard my daddy say to my mommy, 'I'm going to eat that pussy when the kids leave.' so I'm saving him!"

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What happens when a chemist dies? They are given a proper funeral and buried.

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Q: What's worse than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? A: One baby nailed to ten trees.

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? Using teamwork and coordination, each can place one foot on the seat of the stool, and using each other for balance and support, they can all stand on the stool. The fact that they are gay is irrelevant.

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a boy jumps off a building why? because he's afraid of heights

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What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW? A porcupine has it's pricks on the outside. A BMW doesn't have pricks on it's bodywork, for a multitude of reasons: - it would increase the coefficient of drag, causing an increase in fuel consumption - the pricks would fall foul of pedestrian safety regulations

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the only way to get across

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How did the terrorist die? He flew a plane into a twin tower

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Two blondes walk into a bar, but they are then puzzled as the door would not budge open for them.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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How many moms does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. They make you do it!

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What did tyler say to Jake? My pussy is wet jew

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops