How come Helen Keller never played professional baseball? Because she was a woman

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How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

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What do you call six white guys on a bench? Six white guys at the park

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What did the flower say to the flowerpot? Nice weather we're having

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was standing up.

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if john has 400 cookies and eats 300 what does he have left? diabetes

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What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

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what did i get my mom for her birthday? Nothing im selfish

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Last night I had a lovely chicken burger I had no mayo left so had to make do with coleslaw but enjoyed it anyway.

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese man get on a cruise ship? He didn't have a ticket.

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Q. What did the chicken say to the buffalo? A. Nothing, this is an improbable predicament.

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Why did Justin Beiber cut his hair It had grown to long

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why was the boy sad? his bellybutton hurt

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a school bus and died.

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Why was the little boy afraid of the dentist because he was a pedophile

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Jacob Mckeand licks his gooch everynight. Some nights he even covers it in maple syrup. 'mmmmm' he thinks to himself as he licks his 7 inch gooch up and down.

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Two muffins are in an oven. They say absolutely nothing because they're muffins and not sentient.

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getting up in the morning is the 3nd hardest thing :DDD

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eh

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what is the difference between a picture of brooklyn decker and my grandma....i jack off to the picture of my grandma

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Why did the man feel like he was flying? Because he had just committed suicide by jumping off of a tall building.

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Two fish are swimming and hit a concrete wall...dam

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

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Joey: hey bobby who you talking to? Bobby: oh yeah I forgot to tell you your mom died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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