A young man walks into a bar. A complicated chain of events leads to him marrying the owner's second cousin's half-niece-in-law.

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roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

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Why did the rooster cross the road? To go play with the other roosters.

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Q: Why wasn't the baby playing with his blocks? A: Because his face was stapled to the floor

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What is worse than being bitten by a snake? Being bitten twice! - Louis

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Why did the Soviet plane crash? It was joseph Stallin in the air.

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why was the man denied his teaching job? because he is a wanted cerial killer in 43 states.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9!

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asians have slitted eyes lol

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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If the Trojan Horse was a deadly deception, is it My Lethal Phony?

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why did the girl moan in pain? she got punched in the face.

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Kevin: Why can't you hear a pterodactyl urinate? Bob: Because it's extinct? Kevin: No you idiot! The P is silent! Pterodactyl: RAARRGHH! (eats Bob)

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what do you call lots of jews on a train? Call them what you want they aren't coming back!

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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You're tearing apart, Lisa!

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an irishman an american and a jihadist get a plane were did they go right through my house

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why did the elephant cross the road? it was the chickens day off.

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what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

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bob said "Hi Joe why the long face" Joe replies "I'm a horse dip sh*t"

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How did the chicken perform the bank robbery? It was crossing the road and cluelessly walked into a bank, and EVERYONE in that bank had Chickenphobia so they just GAVE him the money...

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Why Do Black People Love Watermelon? Because Its A Delicious Fruit.

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BAr intO a wAlks… sorry I wrote that joke after walking out of a bar.

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Help me I need to know how to cook a human fetus by tomorrow does anyone know any good recipes?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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