What's harder than nailing a dead baby on a tree? My dick while doing it.

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Some potential names for Justin Beiber's next album: Headache Wailing and Screaming Eardrum Rapist Anger Half Price Indescribable Out of Print April Fools The Sounds of Hell Torture Ear Basher

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There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

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Chuck Norris walks up to a baby and punches it in the face He walks away and laughs

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it all began in 1807 when a 7 foot rooster gave birth to a chicken on the sidewalk while purchasing ice cream. Scientists have been intrigued so they went into study with it and won the Nobel prize. This somehow persuaded them to lure the chicken over to the other side by using a lollipop. They threw the lollipop as the chicken crossed the road, hit it in the eye, the chicken spazzed out, jumped in front of a car, teleported to London, and is now a gynecologist.

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what do eagles and chetos have in common....... they both can fly except for the chetos

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What do you call a place full of large volumes of random, unwanted knowledge? The usersub on this site.

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How do you prevent a baby from crawling all over the place? You nail his hands to the floor

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A man walks in to a bar and orders a drink. He has been drinking alone every day since his wife an unborn child died in an horrific car accident.

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There was a man with a job and kids. One day he came home from his job and went to sleep. He never woke up because it turns out he had a heart attack.

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What should you say when someone says a bad joke? I'm sorry, your joke cannot be completed as dialed. Please hang up and don't try again.

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BIG MAC'S

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How many trees does it take to screw in a light bulb? Trees are incapable of screwing light bulbs

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Why does Santa Claus drink so much hot Cocoa? Because Mrs. Claus got tired of his constant drunkenness and won't allow beer in the house in the house anymore.

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What were Benjamin Franklin's first words after he died? It's been 225 years and we still don't know yet.

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Whats funnier then two babies falling off a cliff? 2 babies falling off a cliff

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What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life moves on, in addition to taking the daily appropriate amount of medication prescribed by her doctor.

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How do you blindfold an Asian person? With a blindfold

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An animal entered my house tonight ! It could only be one thing : A bear or a dog.

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guest who else is a ugly bitch my mom

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What do lawyers and sharks have in common? They both play vital roles in their own society or ecosystem.

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What do you call a person with an axe stuck to his head? What's your name?

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Jamie Oliver eats a chip

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Pete and repeat are in a boat. Pete kills him self due chronic depression. Repeat laughs his ass off

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops