A Quadriplegic walks into a bar.

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What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? Nothing... he looked him up and down and spat at him instead.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Q: what's green and has wheels? A: a john deere tractor

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken is subject to speculation.

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Was the worlds most expensive comedian any fun? Well, he was funny, but they where all cheap laughs. Moral: Expensive jokes are expensive.

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I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

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Why was the boy laughing at Sally? Because Sally was a man

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You're mama's so stupid, she decided to go back to school and finish her degree in Russian Literature to improve her self-esteem and maybe -- just maybe -- save her marriage, which had been on the rocks, mostly due to her intolerable self-loathing.

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Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your ball sack ripped off with a grapple hook

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: b/c it was dead. Q: Why did the second monkey fall out if the tree? A: b/c it was stapled to the first one. Q: Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A: b/c he thought it was a game. Q: Why did the toaster fall out of the tree? A: The branch snapped. Q: Why did the little girl fall off of her bike? A: She was hit by three monkeys and a toaster :( MAB99

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how much kush does it take to get kushagra high

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a man walks into a bar. it was a metal bar. his balls hurt.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Someone said "catch" and threw a bowling ball at him.

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whats the difference between 69 and 6.9 theres a period in the middle

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What's worse than an asian driver? A blindfolded asian driver.

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Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

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Why did they serve Swiss cheese at the church? It was lunchtime.

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How do you find out the population of Mexico? The census.

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your mommas so stupid she tried to climb mountain dew well im glad your mom is intrested in trying new things

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops