Q: Why did Sally fall off the swing? A: How the heck would I know? I don't Sally.

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What kind of people have fat lips? People who have gotten punched in the lip or have suffered a serious lip injury that has caused their lips to swell up.

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I like my coffee how I like my women Without a penis

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What's the difference between a park bench and a hobo? The park bench can support a family

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-Knock knock! -Who's there? -DEFAX.

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The Yak, a long-coated bovine found in the Himalayas, is named for its distinct call, which sounds similar to "yak-yak-yakyak".

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Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

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What do you call two black people on one bike? Unsafe. Regular bicycles are typically not suited for use by two people at once, black or otherwise. Riding on the handlebars is dangerous and can lead to serious injury.

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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Jimmy is taking a walk to Dairy Queen he walks into an allyway where he is shot with a 44 magnum and later dies in hospital his family morns

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What did the penguin say to the peacock? Die, you homosexual!

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Why cant the guy drink his beer Because he hasnt opened it yet

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What's black and runs fast? Newsflash: Most of you are racist.

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How do you blind an Asian? Rip out his eyeballs.

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Once upon a time, your dog got hit by a car this morning

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Hook a finger from each hand in your mouth, now pull so your lips are tight and try to say "I was born on a pirate ship" I'm sorry, I can hardly understand you.

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What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

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boobs!

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Q: Why didn't Dwight D. Eisenhower play with the silly putty? A: Because he's dead.

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How do you get a cow off a swing? Hit it with an axe.

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i like turtles

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Yo Momma's so fat......... that she should probably start eating healthy and exercising more regularly or else she may be at risk of developing heart disease or diabetes

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How do you save the world in 2012? You aren't. 2012 isn't going to happen!

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why did the man stop his bike he was having a heart attack

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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