What did jimmy say when his brother had been mean to him all day and he was about to get a straw and his brother took the last one? That was the last straw!

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

whats worse than a pile of dead babies? two piles of dead babies.

whose a bitch? ian doyle's a bitch

the awkward moment when a fat person says they are fat

roses are red, violets are purple, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

A man wakes up after only one hour of sleep due to his insomnia. He starts to cry because his wife just passed away and his parents were recently killed in a car accident. The man gathers his composure, takes a shower, and drives to his minimum wage job. He was expelled from high school for an assault he didnt even commit and has no money to get an education. At work, he accidentally drops a box of valuable, fragile electronic parts and gets fired by his boss. He goes home to his dirty 1 bedroom apartment and contemplates suicide. He decides to wait as his favorite tv show is on. He turns on the tv to the news his show has been cancelled. The man, depressed, suicidal and alone, picks up his .22 and kills himself. There is no God.

Little molly says she wants to have a baby when she grows up because her little baby brother died of ta-sacs 6 months after birth.

What'd the mexican get for his birthday, birthday cards from his friends and family.

What is annoying and uses another language? Spanish class!

Nina and Harry sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes divorce because their marriage didn't turn out right and Harry hit Nina in the head with a iron...

What do you get when you hit a deer? A dead deer, which you should probably take home to eat - wouldn't want it to go to waste.

Why does mcguigan get made fun of ? Because he is gay with Jack Walsh

A man walks into a bar, ouch!

Joesph Triphook.

Where do you study to get a good education? A library, at home, or at another quiet location where it is easy to concentrate.

What's green and fuzzy, has 4 legs, and if it falls from a tree it'll kill you? A pool table.

A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

What's the difference between a man and a woman? The latter has two additional letters added to the beginning.

How do you stop an asshole from being an asshole toward you? Shoot him in the head.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "why the long face" The bartender then sees the horse's broken leg and proceeds to buy him a free drink.

What do you can an astronaut with an apple? Never mind, I have a boner.

How do you stop a rhino from charging? An ak-47

Q: What is usually black , is a rectangle and has two circles? A: An i pod touch 4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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