God is the English name given to a singular being in theistic and deistic religions who is either the sole deity in monotheism, or a single deity in polytheism. He (I use the term 'He' as it is the most common conception) is said to be omniscient, omnipotent, omnipresent, and omnibenevolent. I highly doubt he will give you lemons.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go home and beat his wife

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Yo momma's such a whore that she violates the sanctity of marriage by sleeping with men other than her husband.

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What's better than your mom dying? Chocolate Cake.

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How did the hairless cat brush its hair? It could not, it was hairless. Also, cats do not have opposable thumbs, making it near impossible to do such a thing.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the stock market crashed 600 points today, and his retirement account took a hit. He can't afford his car anymore.

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What's your blood type? Red.

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what happened when steven hawking's date stood him up? he feel down

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OMG my mom just let me go to a concert in feb 31,2012 wohoo! LOL

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No Ok

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Your mamas so stupid, her IQ is lower than the average person of her age group.

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Have you heard of that new jewish car? No, have you? No.

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How can you tell if a duck is quaking? Hear it

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ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! oh wait i think i missed the joke, what?

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Why did the black guy get hit by a banana He was low on potassium and his friend threw the banana too hard

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How do you get a girl to pay for food? You Rape Her

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Science fact: what would happen if you lined up all the veins in your body? You would die.

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What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

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A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his town.

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why did the black man sit in the back of the bus? becouse all the seat where taken in the front

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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What's green and looks like a forest? A forest.

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knowck knowck whos there? shea shea who? shea...duh!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops