Two horses were in a field. One said "this is a good place to hide". The other said, "well, let's hope they don't Findus here!"

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What's more fun than nailing a baby to a wall? Pulling it off.

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What did Juliet tell Romeo before they kissed? Kiss me Romeo

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Yo mama is so fat, we are all concerned about her weight.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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A horse walks into a bar. the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse does not reply because it is a horse. The horse walks out of the bar kicking over some chairs and scaring some people because he is a horse and horses do not belong in public atmospheres.

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes Good. Enjoy your cold drinks.

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The philosophy professor decided to isolate himself in his closet until he figured out the meaning of life. After ten years, he had done it. He came out of isolation and immediately found one of his former colleagues on campus. He said, "I've discovered the meaning of life!" The colleague said, "Ok, what is it?" The professor said, "Life is like a bridge." The colleague said, "How so?" After a few moments, the professor nodded and said, "Yea, I guess you're right."

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Whats something really annoying? A guy who presses enter too much. hehe

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One Direction???? Gifted singers???? HA HA HA

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\ \ \\ \\ >\/ 7 _.-(6' \ (=__._/` \ ) \ | / / | / > / j < _\ _.-' : ``. \ r=._\ `. \ > ,.-' >.'

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What's black and white and red all over? A Nazi banner.

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whats the fastest way to be murdered tell your wife your cheating on her

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Roses are red, Violets are blue.. And IDGAF!

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what's purple and plastic purple plastic

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Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

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What's harder than nailing a dead baby on a tree? My dick while doing it.

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To suck my dick

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what did the man say after he fell off the cliff nothing, he's dead

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What do you call a boy with no arms or legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

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p

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why am I writing this...im bored

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops