Girl: What's up? Guy: If I told you, would you sit on it?

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I was raped the other day... I still did more work than the bitch

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Ask me if im a truck are you a truck no

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Why did the joke feel paranoid? Because everyone kept laughing at him.

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Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs? So nobody finds he's been fucking hens.

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What do you call a latino with a limp? John...his name is John

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Q: how do you fit 100 jews in a car A: 3 in the back one in the passenger seat and 96 in the ash tray

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outside your comfort zone

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How meny Jews can you fit in an ash-tray? None. There to big

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What did the Rabbi get for Christmas? Nothing because as you know Rabbi's are members of the Jewish community and therefore don't celebrate Christmas.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead.

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A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

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What's worse than Christmas alone? Pedophiles.

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Who's a tool and a NARC? Josh Brami!

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What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? ouch.

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Thankgiving Jimmy: I'm thankful for my family Thomas: I'm thankful for shelter Jake: I'm thankful for running over babies

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple You thought I was going to steal an anti-joke didnt you squidward

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Why did the Liberal tell the truth? If one ever does we will have the answer.

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Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

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A horse walks into a bar You have been reading so many anti jokes that you can actually anticipate the anti-joke punchline to this joke, because it is one of maybe 3 or 4.

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What do you get when you cross a turtle and a platypus? Well, I don't think it's genetically possible by nature, but Turtpus is a pretty funny name.

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I found my car in the lot with a broken tail-light and a note under the windscreen wipers. I accidentally reversed into your car, Lots of people saw me do it. They all think I'm writing down my name and details, Well, I'm not.

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One day there was 3 bears, a papa bear, a mama bear, and a baby bear. They were out swimming when suddenly a girl comes over to their house and tries to sit down. She sits on the big chair and says "too big", then she sits on the little chair and says "too small" and then sits on the medium chair and says "just right". Suddenly, the bears come back. Papa bear: "somebody has been sitting on my chair!" Baby bear "somebody has been sitting on my chair too!" Mama bear "somebody has been sitting on my chair, and she still here!" The girl says "Hi my name is Goldilocks." After about few minutes introducing each other, they ate dinner and they all had a great time.

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kill yourself....with a cigarette

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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