A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle

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What do you call an obese kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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What's worse than bombs? Nukes

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As far as I know, the day after tomorrow is going to be YOUR lucky day, because you will be tasting sausage for the first time with your lower lips... No seriously, you cant be virgin, you can tell me the truth, you like 24 or something?

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Q: What is George Harrison's favorite hairstyle? A: How can we know? He's dead!

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A blonde, a redhead and a brunette were on an island. There were loads of other people too - the UK is a pretty popular place to live.

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What's just not right? Left

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How do you make a baby cry Throw a brick at its face

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Why did the the dog not eat its food? Because the night before the dog had gotten serious disease and lost appetite

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What do you call a black man eating fried chicken? By his name, which could be John, considering the popularity of said name.

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A Chinese man, a Mexican man and an African man walk into an American bar. None of them know any English and can not order a drink. They walk out promptly, frustrated by the difficulties of living in a strange new world where they don't speak the native language.

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What do you call a black man being raped by 6 members of the Ku Klux Klan? Rape

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Some anti-jokes are funny, some are not!

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A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

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why was the black man scared of cats ? Because a gang of cats ate his family

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Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

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What do you call a Mexican that sails a ship? A sailor

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Yo mama is so fat that she is in a diet and wants to lose weight by eating healthy.

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So I went to an audition, my friend said "break a leg" And then I did

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Person: hey buddy have you heard the greteat news Freind: yea you have aids Person: no my wife jusr became a pristatue an she had ten patients already i was her first

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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