A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar They are friends and continue to have a pleasant evening

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what does a jet and plane have in common? the letter "e"

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How many Terry Pratchetts does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven they say nothing to eachother because they are muffins and cannot speak if they did they would most likely be taken by the US government and studied and assumed to be alien life forms but anyway the muffins were taken out later and presumably eaten

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What was pauls mum screaming? Rape

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How many dueche bags does it take to change a light bulb? 0 They're two complete unrelated things

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roses are red tulips are too, violets are violet, not freaking blue.

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How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

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Roses are Red Violets are blue I am an onlince predator Post your address in the comment EJ

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Why did the girl drop her cookie? She had no arms.

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Barman: Why the long face? Horse: To support my twelve molars and twelve premolars which help me chew grass so I can swallow it properly.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm bad at poetry, ELEPHANTS!

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How does Lady Gaga like her meat? Cooked until it reaches an internal temperature of 180 degrees Fahrenheit to lower the risk of contracting diseases such as salmonella.

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What's more annoying than dyslexic jokes? Jokes were peopel spel words rong.

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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Why did the squirrel cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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catastrophic anthropogenic global warming

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your mom. Just kidding, it's the pizza guy. Pizza guy who?

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How does Helen Keller play the piano? With one hand.. She needs the other hand to sing.

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What do you call a hindu that has radiation poisoned A radiatative hindu

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Whats the difference between anti-jokes and regular jokes? A Fridge full of dead babies being thrown at a black man with no arms or legs swinging from a tree.

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Why do beavers have flat tails? They don't know but their relatives certainly get upset

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Roses are red, and violets are freakin violet. Not blue.

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What did I say to my mum this morning? Good morning.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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