Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

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person: Ask me if i'm a tree other person: are you a tree? person: no

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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Why was the boy laughing at Sally? Because Sally was a man

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Was the worlds most expensive comedian any fun? Well, he was funny, but they where all cheap laughs. Moral: Expensive jokes are expensive.

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I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

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how much kush does it take to get kushagra high

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a man walks into a bar. it was a metal bar. his balls hurt.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Someone said "catch" and threw a bowling ball at him.

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A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

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whats the difference between 69 and 6.9 theres a period in the middle

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What's worse than an asian driver? A blindfolded asian driver.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

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How do you find out the population of Mexico? The census.

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A Muslim walks into a bar, and has a pint of lager because he has chosen to integrate into his host country's culture. He then leaves without incident.

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It's raining, its pouring, the old man is snoring. He bumps his head, and is quickly rushed to the ER for serious head trauma

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What's the worst subject in school? None of them. You need school to get by in life. Get over it.

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Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? ... To get to the bottom.

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your mommas so stupid she tried to climb mountain dew well im glad your mom is intrested in trying new things

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

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Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

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Jack and Jill went up the hill. But it was winter and they froze to death

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Periods are red, waffles are blue, some poems rhym, this one doesn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops