Q; why did the German ask the Jew to go in his shower? A; because the Jew had stayed the night at the Germans house.

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Why did the... Timmy, your mother and I are both tired.

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joe galasso from plainview ny

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. I am blind.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Before you sneeze Say PIK-Achoo

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You go to the Anti Joke website, what do you find under the "newest" section? Black jokes.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

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Where would you find 10 dead babies buried next to each other? In a cemetary.

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Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

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What has two legs? Half a cat

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A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

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How do you double any amount of cash? Stack it up and fold it in half.

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Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

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What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

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Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

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Whats blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint.

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Three guys walk into a bar: a Priest, a rapist, and a pedophile...and two other guys

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My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

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Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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