Why did the man kill his friend? How am I supposed to know

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An Iranian, a Mexican, and an American are on an airplane. The plane is too heavy to take off, so to lighten the load, each person has to throw off something their country has a lot of. The Iranian throws off a nuclear bomb. The Mexican throws off a sombrero. The American throws off an apple pie.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock, whos there? Not sally

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I was flying in the sky but lost control and crashed. I woke up on the floor.

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how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

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Why did the Polish man cross the road? Because the doctors was across the road, and he had a doctor appointment in five minutes time.

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas ? A treadmill

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Ben Dover Come in

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make me a sandwich! what kind?

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800 people died last year. end of story

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What is better than winning a gold medal at the parolympic games? Having two legs!

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whats black, white, and bloody all over? i don't know, but we should stop making jokes and help it already.

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Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, but the very next day, your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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What's big fat and ugly? A monster

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What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

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A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

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Whats the difference between a bottle of coke and a black man stuck in a phone booth? one of them is comparing himself to a bottle of coke, the other is a bottle of pepsi

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

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Someone just commented on my joke! ... oh wait it was myself

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Q: Why did the dog bark? A: it cant talk.

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What do you call a person who drinks beer a lot? Alcohol abuser.

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Why is it a bad idea to stand in a thunder and lightning storm with a metal rod? Because you will get wet from the rain.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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