In soviet Russia...things are different

Your mom is so old she died

What do you call two gays with small dicks? Trace and Jacob

How do you blind an Asian man You stab him six times in each eye socket and drop cyan pepper in his eye wound.

What did the dyslexic boy get for Christmas? A laptop. And he was very happy.

What do you call a fly without wings? A rather unfortunate physical disability

What did the virgin say to the car salesmen? Hello, I'm really interested in buying a car today.

Roses are red. Violets are blue.

My brother gave my mom AIDS. My mom gave my dad AIDS. My dad gave my dog AIDS. My dog gave me AIDS. I gave my sister AIDS. My sister called the police because of the wild case of AIDS.

Why was the cancer patient often bullied by his peers? Because he happened to be an extremely bad person. He often annoyed people, was intransigent and often aggravated those around him causing them to bully him.

Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear Fuzzy wuzzy had no hair Fuzzy wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy, was he? No, because he had cancer.

Boy: Knock Knock! Girl: Who's there? Boy: It's me, John. Girl: Oh, come in!

have you seen the movie, Constipated? Never mind, it hasn't come out yet.

How do you kill Chuck Norris? Shoot him in the face.

What is so sad about 5 black people going over a cliff in a Ferrari? That was my Ferrari by darragh hamilton

A white guy jumps over the fence belonging to a Mexican family

A man was mowing the lawn. The mower stops, so he look to see if something stuck in the blades. What did he pull out? Nothing, the gas ran out.

Q: What did hitler say to his generals? a: In a circumstance as the one we have found ourselves in. Eliminating our most threatening of enemies would be very logical. Unless they were of the superior race therefore, it may be frowned apon by our low ranked comrades. Causing another assasionation attempt on myself. So in conclusion I believe eliminating a rich and intelligent race far more superior than our own, would be the best way to go. So collect the Jews of Warsaw and we might have a chance.

what did John do to make the cold weather a little less irritating? well, being a homeless man, John did..... nothing.

Did you hear the one about the streetlight? It only came on at night.

Ryan O'Sullivan likes to suck his own penis. - Ryan O'Sullivan.

How do you stop a dog from digging up your garden? Every time it does so, shout at the dog so it knows it has misbehaved. Keep doing this and the dog will eventually understand the error of its ways.

Knock Know Who's there? Not your dog, he just got run over.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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