So a baby seal walks into a club.

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How do you make an ugly person not ugly? Put a bag over their head. With,, a smiley face.

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What do you call a mormon in a red jumpsuit covered in black spots? Proper terminology for this scenario has not been yet made

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there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

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One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

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What do you call a swimming pool full of black people? A family enjoying their holiday.

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A black guy and a mexican get into a car Who is driving? Whoever takes a seat in the drivers side of the car

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If at first you don't succeed, go kill yourself

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of lollipop? unknown.

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Why didn't Jacob marry Bella from Twilight? You have to be real to marry someone

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Two Mexicans are at the border and want to cross it. How do they cross it? Illegally

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What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

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what did the apple say to the orange? :nothing because an apple is not a human organism nor an orange therefore they can not speak....

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to my house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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A man walks into a bar, the other man ducks.

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What was the racist kid's least favorite ice cream flavor? Chocolate for an unrelated reason.

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What's worse than r-a-p-e? Gang r-a-p-e.

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Q:What do you call chocolate without a gag reflex? A: Choc-o-late (Choke a lot)

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Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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-I have an idea! Let's play twenty questions! -Alright! But i have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

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Why did the man cross the street? Because he had to go work.

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What do mario and luigi have in common They are both plumbers

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a fat man walks out of mcdonalds

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Depends on the polar bear and its dietary habits

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops