What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

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What did the orange say to the lemon? "Hello"

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An Iranian, a Mexican, and an American are on an airplane. The plane is too heavy to take off, so to lighten the load, each person has to throw off something their country has a lot of. The Iranian throws off a nuclear bomb. The Mexican throws off a sombrero. The American throws off an apple pie.

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What's wheels and has green? Lied, I grassed about the wheels.

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A horse walks into the bar. The bartender asks "why the long face" Turns out the horse's family died that evening.

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I like my coffee like i like my women, blonde with big boobs.

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What do you call a guy with no arms or legs laying on your driveway? You call him by his name

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What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

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Why did the Black man cross the road? To get to Pop-Eye's since KFC is too expensive nowadays. HELL-YA

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Yo mama is so old, that it's becoming apparent that she is most likely developing severe senial dementia

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

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Why did the man kill his friend? How am I supposed to know

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Q. What did the girl on drugs get for Easter? A. Down Syndromes Disease.

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selena gomez & justin beiber go in space. selena says im hotter than the sun. the way she knows this information is that she is near the sun at this time justin beiber has already drifted off in space.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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I was flying in the sky but lost control and crashed. I woke up on the floor.

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Why did the Polish man cross the road? Because the doctors was across the road, and he had a doctor appointment in five minutes time.

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? A nice sweater.

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Have you ever seen the movie called "The Tourist"? No

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Justin's life

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Thumbs up if u dont have aids:)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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