A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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What's three times More dangerous than a war? Three wars

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Person #1: Hello captain obvious. Person #2: Hello.

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why did the little girl fall off the swing she had no arms

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A german police officer sees a Rabbi. Nothing happens, it's 2011

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I was walking down the road yesterday with only 1 shoe. A man stops by and says "Did you know that you lost a shoe?" I reply "No I didn't. I found 1."

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You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

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Your mums a potato

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Bob: Do you know the difference between beer and women? John: No Bob: Oh

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How many people like gang rape? 9 out of 10

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

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How fast can you paint a fence with babies? Depends how fast you can throw them.

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An Asian person drove home safely.

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what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

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What was the racist kid's least favorite ice cream flavor? Chocolate for an unrelated reason.

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What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

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Knock Knock there's a doorbell

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knock knock whos there? jew jew who ? jew son o a b**** ? (aimed at ight wing racist jews)

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What do you call a group of geese? A giggle

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Q: What's the difference between a black man from San Diego and a white man from Miami? A: They live in different cities, and in the presidential election, the black man voted for Obama and the white man voted for McCain

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what did the lesbian do with the other lesbian? played badminton

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How do you know when you've ritten too many anti-jokes? When you answer your own question as a rhetorical device

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Why does Suzie like to wear sunglasses? Because she's blind.

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How can you tell if a man has an erection? His penis is no longer flaccid

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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