why was the boy mad? He had a lot of homework that evening

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A Horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks the horse, "Why the long face?". The horse didn't understand English, so he took a shit on the floor, and left.

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What did the black man drink on a hot summer day? Some water, it quickly replenished the liquids he was perspiring do to the temperature being sufficiently hotter than his body temperature

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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how do you make an idiot laugh? tell him a joke from antijoke

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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What do you give a sick bird? Tweetment.

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38 studio's new game... Finance City

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i have a pet duck, when i take it a bath i use cold water, if i use hot water it and i drop a carrot in the tub it will think im cooking it.

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Why was the kid dizzy? He ran in a circle repeatedly.

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if life gives you lemons. squeeze one into your moms eye.

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Q: My hands are queefing vaginas A: Milk isn't wearing underwears

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Q: What's green, red, and covered in cookie crumbs? A: A dead girl scout.

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What the last thing that went through Osama's mind? A bullet

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Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, but the real question is why there are two flies having sex inside a light bulb.

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Whats better than seeing a worm in your apple... Reading the the next anti-joke.

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What do you call a person with cancer A hospital patient, what did you expect? Oh. Of course you expected Chewbacca.

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Q:Why do you never run over black guy on a bicycle A: Because that is not a very nice thing to do

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If Waldo and Carmen Sandiego had a child it would be fictional.

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hmm, thinking, thinking, SNAPPLE!

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Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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