A man walks into a bar and pulls out a tiny piano and a 12 inch pianist, which is really just his member with a smiley face drawn on it. Somebody calls the police muttering, "What is this world coming to?"

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Jesus, Buddha and Mohamed walked into a bar and say: "There is as much validity in this fiction as in our collective works.

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knock knock! who is there? its knock! knock who??? knock knock... who is there.... i told you its knock... knock who??? knock knock... WHO IS THERE!! OMG I TOLD YOU ITS KNOCK! KNOCK WHO!! WHO IS KNOCK! KNOCK KNOCK OMG WTF! HOLY SHIT WHO IS THERE! ITS KNOCK WE HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER OUR WHOLE LIVES! KNOCK WHO?? KNOCK KNOCK WHY DONT YOU REMEMBER ME! oh knock knock from next door! who is there???? jk.. knock...knock......omg put down the gun knock knock stop i love you knock its not worth it!! NO KNOC!!! GUNSHOT* KNOCK NOOOOO!!! I LOVED YOU SOMEONE CALL 911!! OMG KNOCK WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH KNOCK WHY!!!!

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How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Let's ride bikes!!

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Blonde: Hey, what does "Idk" mean? Blonde's friend: "I don't know" Blonde: Thank you for telling me, that has been bothering me for quite some time now.

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Q: What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? A: Shoveling them out with a pitchfork.

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How did the black person die? Of old age

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WILLY

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What does a blond do when she stops at a red light? She gets arrested.

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What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? An ambulance.

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There is an American, a Mexican, and a Muslim on a plane They give the American the 1 parachute and the Mexican and the north koreon explode

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What gets you a succesful life and career? Swag

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Roses are red violets are blue, he is for me and not for you, he's too ugly you can have him

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Three dogs are barking at a wall. People walk by thinking "Why are these dogs barking at a wall?".

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what is Rebecca black's favorite restaurant? Ruby Tuesdays

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Yo Mama's so fat Everyone is very concerned for her Health.

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Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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What did the dog say to the human? Nothing really. Dogs technically "speak" through barking.

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What is the biggest lie in the world? I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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Why did the girls hair catch on fire her neighbor bullied her

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What do you call Chuck Norris being killed? This is impossible so we are not give it a name.

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Why did the gay man's ass hurt? He has rectal cancer.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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I think everybody should have a penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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