What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a bar? Hahaha you walked into a bar. What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a pub? AHH-JOOOOO!!!

Jesus walks on water, Humans are 70% water, I can walk on humans, Therefore i am 70% Jesus.

Two horses were discussing their racing records. The first said, "In my whole life I had won ten races." The second horse says, "Well, I've won twelve of those!" A greyhound trotting by chimes in, "Not bragging guys, but in my career, I've won twenty!" "Unbelievable!" exclaimed both horses. "It's a talking dog!"

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree He was stapled to the first monkey Why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? its a refridgerator Why did the third monkey jump out of the tree It thought it was a game

Q: What do you call an orange if it isn't orange? A: Nothing. Chances are you won't see it until it has ripened.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape a duck

What do you call your mother's bipolar brother with three arms? Uncle.

3 Women were on a desert Island, This Island was situated in the middle of the Atlantic so there was no hope of survival.

What's worse than getting punched in the balls? Many things inflict more pain than that

What do trees and people have in common? If you hit them enough times with an axe they will fall over.

Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

"You must defeat Shen Long to stand a chance"

Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

Yo mama so fat when she dresses in red she looks like clifford the big red dog!

How do you kill a Jewish person? You shoot him multiple times in the face

A rabbai , a mexican , and a ginger are In a car going over a cliff. Which one dies? Who cares?

Q Whats the difference between a pich fork with watermelons and a pitch for with dead babies stuck on. A The pitchfork with the dead babies were severly shot in the kidneys and then the heart. Blake

yo mummas so FAT to get to the other side

Once their was an ugly barnacle. He was sooooo ugly that everyone died! The end. :D

Your mother is so poor she doesn't have any money!

How did the Mexican get into the United States? He showed his passport, and the correct documents & information, and was admitted into the country as a new American citizen.

Person1: Man I had the worst day ever. Person2: Worser than the holocaust.

What is the meaning of life? Bill Gates: Windows Donald Trum: Money Some poor kid:luck and rich parents.

What do Justin Bieber and Eminem have in common? They both need to get a life. I lied about Eminem.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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