How do you make an emo kid cry? He already is.

Why did the man say "huh?" Because he didn't hear what they said.

What's big fat and ugly? A monster

Faith, Family, Friends, those are three words.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Whose there? Obviously not Suzie.

My grandfather died in a Nazi Death Camp. He fell off a watch tower.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

What is the difference between a black person and a pizza? Nothing, they both taste like chicken

one time, there was this anti-joke.com joke set-up. It was just like a normal joke set-up. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

What did the sign say? It said slow down

Knock Knock! Who's there? The police, your father just died in a boat accident.

How do you blindfold a Chinese man? With a blindfold.

How did little Sally break her Nintendo DS? Her abusive father repeatedly abused her and punished her until she was thrown into a stone wall. As she went into the wall she crushed by another wall and broke the DS.

What did the man say when he found a bar of soap in his mailbox? Why is there soap in my mailbox?

Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

Roses are red, But ravens are black, Please go to China, and never come back!

How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

What's the difference between Jesus and a painting? It only takes one nail to hang up a painting.

What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

how do you save a black person that's drowning? you blow up their lips

What is the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The word anti before anti-joke.

This is supposed to be an anti-joke.

Why are objects in your mirror closer than they appear? Because they are closer than they appear.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car, Robin.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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