Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

why did susy fall off the swing? Cause she has no arms knock knock Who's there? not susy

What's the difference between Barney the dinosaur and Santa? Barney Loves you.

What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both live underground apart from the eagle.

Frontbut-

A black man a white man and an asian man walk into a bar have a few drinks and on thier drive home run over a three year old little girl and here to month old sister and they go to prison for the rest of thier lives (they shouldn't of let the asian drive)

So a duck walks into a pharmacy and says "i need some ointment for my beak, its rather chapped." and the Pharmacist said "Sorry we don't have anything for ducks here."

What is long, hard and comes out of a gay persons bum? poo

Q: What did the angry German man say to the Ameican? A: I dont know, I can't speak German!

A black, jew, mexican, and american are on the boat. The boat begins to sink. As an idea, they all throw stuff off the boat to try to stay afloat. The black throws off cotton, the jew throws off yamakas, and the mexican throws off sombreros. Then, the american throws off the mexican because there are too many in his country. The mexican drowns. The boat still sinks and the american goes to hell while the other go to heaven.

Jeff comes home from a long day at work. As a result he is very tired. So, he decides to go to bed.

Where do you study to get a good education? A library, at home, or at another quiet location where it is easy to concentrate.

How do you stop a bus? You press the brake pedal, causing the brake pads to squeeze the tires. Which will slow the momentum of the bus to the point of stopping.

why is a peanut butter and jelly sandwich the same as a tub of fish? they are both food

I like my women like I like my coffee... In a cup.

IMMA FIND YO ASS DO!!!!!

What did the police officer say to the bank robber? You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to speak to an attorney, and to have an attorney present during any questioning. If you cannot afford a lawyer, one will be provided for you at government expense.

Man: Did It Hurt Woman: Did what hurt? Man: When your legs were crushed after being run over by that semi

A man was going to take his girlfriend to prom, and decided to pick up his suit from the dry cleaners. Unfortunately, there was a long line. He then went to pick up some flowers for his date, but there was a long flower line. Finally, he takes his date to prom and decides to get some punch for them.He returns with the refreshing beverage and the couple has a wonderful time.

What did the electron do after losing his proton? Trough electromagnetical forces, the electron simply left it's atom, making it become a positive ion. Then, atracted by other atom's magnetical force, it joins the other atom's last vallence shell, creating a negative ion, since there are more electrons then protons in the atom in issue.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, that was a turkey. Oh.

Why can't kids do drugs in school? Because it's against the rules.

Q. Why were the children sad? A. They'd just been abducted by a dodgy old man in a van.

Did you hear about the one about the man who walked into the library? He likes reading

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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