So, my friend David hasn't always been the sharpest tool in the shed. After all, he is a spoon.

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A man walks into a music store and hears dubstep playing in the background and he says, "Ugh! I hate dubstep!" Suddenly the clerk gets extremely offended and says, "Haters gonna be gay!" The man chuckles at the clerk's remark and shakes his head. "No no no silly," He said. "Haters gonna not be deaf." He says shaking his head as he walks out. The clerk tries to elaborate on what the man meant, but he realizes he cannot hear his thoughts.

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Three Jewish men walk into a butcher. They dont buy any pork products and thank the butcher for his services.

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Where does a king keep his armies? In his sleevies

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What do you call your mother's bipolar brother with three arms? Uncle.

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what is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a cadilac. a cadilac is something i want

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

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Knock knock? Who's there? You have cancer.

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Romeo and Juliet both die at the end of the book. HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHA i just screwed you guys over.

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Rubies are red Some diamonds are blue I have candy so get in my car

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What is big, grey, has 8 wheels, can fly, swim and walk. I dunno. Thats why I'm asking

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What do you call a mexican man with a rubber toe? Ruberto.

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NO ONE LIKES YOU!!!!

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What did Ghandi tell St Peter as he passed through the Gates of Heaven? He didn't. There is no afterlife.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pickles.

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Hmmm, how would Sherlock Holmes solve a crime?... Oh wait. He doesn't exist.

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Whats the difference between Rolf Harris and a pedophile Whoops I didn't quite think this one through

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Three people are stranded on an island. They didn't want to eat each other because they were friends. They died of starvation.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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What's worse than losing the remote? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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your moma is sao fat that she is gay . nope im sorry thats just mean.

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A frog walks up to Steve, and says "Hey, Steve." Steve is terrified because a frog knows his name, and is walking.

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The child was fired from his job.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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